I think I'm ready to leave Melbourne

So blessed by the worship Faith led yesterday. The last time she led worship at Easter, I was also so blessed :')

I think enough has been said about this semester, about the frustrations of management consulting. The uncertainty, uncontrollable factors are just out of my hands.

I kept trying to surrender it to Him. But honestly, I suddenly forgot how to. I prayed, but I forgot some beliefs of what He'll do for me. I know His plans will be for my well-being, will be for my good. I know trusting Him is the ONLY way, is my ONLY security. But I wanted to know and hear what was it He wanted to tell me. I was waiting... and waiting... I got so tired, especially after Wednesday - dread Wednesdays; I have client meetings on Wedn :(

Then yesterday I realised that recently I forgot something. I forgot the verse that gave me strength thus far.

Isaiah 55:8-9 For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways, declares the Lord. For as the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.

This semester is the most challenging one of all. But I thank God for the lessons He has taught me thus far. I think it's really a good conclusion of my stay in Melbourne. I must say the challenges I've faced, with the Holy Spirit in me, was the best lesson. I know the strengthening of my faith at this moment, before I go back to Singapore, will help me. It feels so much like a 2-year retreat to seek another side of God that I've never seen.

Last semester, I really don't know how I'll be able to leave this place. I was so heartbroken and quite devastated. I was questioning and asking "how can anyone not be heartbroken, leaving a place where you've learnt, where you've seen, where you've tasted His love. Why must this change break my heart, why cant I continue to dwell with Him in this place". Even when my parents insisted on me going back, even when I gave up trying to stay, I was actually still very hurt.

But now, I think I'm ready to leave. I think He has been prepared me enough and carefully removed the glass pieces piercing my heart <3 I can't even believe this change of heart, but I'm so thankful & so in love with Him :')

I am so in love with You, there is no one else like You. 
I lean not on my own understanding, my life is in the hands of the maker of heaven. 
I Give it all to you God, trusting that you'll make something beautiful out of me 
I will climb this mountain with my hands wide open

I've learnt, seen, and tasted.