Interview

The call came last Monday 14 Sept (right after GE weekend). I was heading for my appointment to dye my hair back to dark brown and a private number called. When I answered (p.s. I ALWAYS miss my calls), she said my name incorrectly so I told her that I wasn’t the person she was looking for and that she called the wrong number. I didn’t know why I was so patient because usually I would have just hung up but I just waited for her over the phone to hang up. Then she realised she made a mistake and told me that I was shortlisted for the interview :’) - omg, I love my God 

I was sooo happy because it was a step closer to my dreams to what I trust God was speaking to me. It took all my trust and faith. I even activated all my close christian friends to pray for me about it. A LOT was at stake. my pride, God’s name and my trust in Him. At some point, I believed whole heartedly that this was it. 

And every night, EVERY NIGHT, during my quiet time, He speaks about it and encourages me towards it. 

I committed to read Power of a praying woman and Psalm every night.

When I was doubtful of myself, doubtful of this calling, He taught me to pray this “5. Lord, Strengthen Me to stand against the enemy"

When I still had trouble having full faith, still believed in the lies of the devil put in my head, He taught me to pray this “6. Lord, show me how to take control of my mind”.

When I had enough of this struggle, I wanted to submit this dream to Him, he taught me to pray this “7. Lord, Rule me in every area of my life" 

When I got so happy I was disciplined in His word the entire week, I just wanted to remember what was more important in my life - Him. I just wanted to keep this relationship we have and continue to feed on this spiritual food that blessed me so much. He taught me to pray this “8. Lord, take me deeper in Your word”

“9. Lord, instruct me as I put my life in right order” This day’s title didn’t really resonate with me much but he reminded me of who the priority in my life should be, he reminded me of my “submission issue” and “all (will) fall into place” (sub topic in this chapter).

When I wanted to remember to praise and worship Him despite the results of the application, He taught me to pray this “10. Lord, prepare me to be a true worshipper"

When I was thinking about the future of this career and how I can be a blessing to every child, He taught me to pray this “11. Lord, bless me in the work i do.” so that I can bless others.

When I got the call and was told I needed to prepare and present a mini lesson, I thought no one teaches better than the Holy Spirit and went on to list down all of the Holy Spirit’s character. He taught me to pray this “12. Lord, plant me so I will bear the fruit of Your Spirit"

The day before my interview, the Lord taught me to pray this “13. Lord preserve me in purity and holiness”. I guessed it was about stepping into the society and what the world has to offer. 

The day after my interview and I feel soo defeated. I started doubting myself of my abilities again. But I had my friends tell me to remember what God has given, no man can take away. God changes situations. and I have to let God do the rest of the work. God taught me to pray this “14. Lord move me into the purpose for which I was created”, “ Lord help me to understand the call you have on my life. Take away any discouragement I may feel and replace it with joyful anticipation of what You are going to do through me. Use me as Your instrument to make a positive difference in the lives of those whom You put in my path. Help me to rest in the confidence of knowing that Your timing is perfect. I know that whatever You have called me to do, You will enable me to do it”.

My God speaks. 

“Many, O Lord, my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us, no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too much to declare” Psalm 40:5

Indeed, there were so much more verses that spoke to me in Psalm and words that encouraged me in the book but if I were to recount, they would be too much.